Between magazines, romantic comedies, and generally baseless cultural assumptions, women have long been guessing what men are really thinking. His feet are slanted towards you at a 15-degree angle? Then he’s in love. 30-degree angle? He wants nothing to do with you. Then there are the totally speculative “what he really wants” sex tips like this real “tip” from a “real” guy in Cosmopolitan: “‘We need you to get a little rough and grab on to it like you’re milking a cow. You may think you’re hurting him, but I guarantee if you ask, he’d request more,’ says Steven, 23.” Why is 23-year-old Steven trying to cause us men so much pain? And aren’t we all smart enough to know that 23-year-old Steven is probably a 30-year-old female staff writer who’s just throwing down some ideas to make deadline?
We men are complex creatures, and we’ll admit that we…
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